Before you think I have gone all perverted, stop. These are actual mascots of events. From top right clockwise:
* 1996 Atlanta Olympic mascot “Izzy”
* 2008 Spain World Expo * 2010 Shanghai World Expo
* 2009 Hong Kong East Asian Games

Having lived through and participated in the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta I heard all the “blue sperm” jokes you could imagine. After that I thought, “ok mistake over, now back to lions, tigers, and bears, oh my.” Nope. I just saw the Shanghai mascot last week. Not only is it ambiguous but it is also blue! Then this week I arrive in Hong Kong to the “white sperm twins” for the East Asian games. Those three alone would have been enough for this article, but then I find the 2008 Spain expo mascots. Posis? Negas? Are you serious? What is Posis even doing to Negas on the bottom right? Do people really want to see this? Please tell me I am not the only person who feels this is wrong.

I only have a few questions:

1. What’s wrong with an animal? Starbucks can dress up the same bear 6 ways to Sunday, but these events can’t manage a new animal look? What about the lemur? When was he a mascot? Or the moth? For that matter, they might as well put Alabama’s dung beetle up as a mascot given this company.
2. Why Blue or White? If you made them brown then… oh…I get why not brown.. but orange or green? What about black? Why can’t we have a “black” mascot, hmm? HMMMM???
3. Why so close together? We have gone from 2008-2010 and all three look very close. STOP COPYING CHINA! The problem with being ambiguous is you can be anything and when you are anything you are also nothing which is what they tend to end up. I think I need to report these and collect my reward to China’s new porn policy: http://bit.ly/7yQ5cw

Now most of these were designed using children’s imaginations and focus groups. The problem with children is that they don’t even know all the animals yet, so of course they sneeze on a paper (or worse) and someone calls it “Izzy!” Please, please, please, to the next event planner, find something with legs, a pulse, and a defined neck and NOT something that looks more like what people in Asia spit on the sidewalks.

Posted via email from beuk’s posterous

Maybe if the news actually cared a little bit more about the write-up on soccer teams in China, then the people would care more about soccer. It is hard to have an article that states how poor Chinese soccer is and that they should schedule matches at better times and encourage children participation when glaring errors are made. Above they posted the same paragraph twice! Apparently Chinese soccer is a joke twice over!

Can’t you just see the editor saying, “Yeah, and throw something in there about soccer while you are at it…”?

And while we are on the subject, why can’t SCMP just let you read the paper online? Why do they have to lock you into a 14-day trial? It is so annoying. Here is the online article but I don’t think you will be able to see it. The good news is that they corrected the mistake online.

Taiwan flag overload
Originally uploaded by beuk

China celebrates 60 yr. of Communist rule and the next week Taiwan us
littered with flags. Hmmm…

Watermelon
Originally uploaded by beuk

South China, South Georgia it doesn’t matter. This kid loves
watermelon. She polished off three slices after her SECOND dinner!

One of the strangest things I am doing now is taking Japanese classes. Not because that in itself is strange, but because my teacher does not speak much English. This means I mostly use Chinese to communicate and ask questions (no-no #1 in learning an Asian language). It actually works out pretty well.

I routinely find strange phrases that make me wish I could just run off and get a Ph.D. in linguistics. (By the way, after reading this you will see why I am crap at languages. My wife can hear a phrase and repeat it like the world’s best Mynah. Me, I need to build all kinds of crazy mnemonics too have a clue. That said, once I know it, I know it.) I am starting to have a lot of crossovers and routinely find myself searching for English words on conference calls with the States due to the rewiring in my brain.

Here are some interesting observations and examples:
Tate Mono (pronounced: Taa Teah Mo No) means house or building. I find this one of the easiest words for me to remember because I love the Tate MOderN in London (pronounced T-eight). It is easy to remember Tate Mono as a building. A NICE building :)
Biiru, Kohii, Noto, Tepurekoda (Beer, Coffee, Notebook, Tape recorder) all sound very close to the English word, but drink to much Biiru…
Otearai (pronounced: Oh Teah Ah Ra EE) meaning toilet and you may have a hard time finding this if you can’t say it! The Brits got this one right with “Loo.” Side Note in China “Lu” means street, which often doubles as the toilet.
~ no ~ no ~ no when describing possessiveness (as in My wife or My book) you use “no.” The problem is there is no limit so you can get sentences that to an outsider sound like “No, No, No!” Interestingly enough the word for “No” in Japanese is “Iie” or what Mr. Miyagi says a lot (seriously go back and watch).
Leggo Eggo I swear this had a meaning, but I forgot to write it down I was laughing so hard.
Shite this actually means “give” as in “Mama cyu shite” (Mama give me a kiss) or “Mama ryori shitte” (Mama give me your cooking). Not to be confused with “Mama your cooking is shite”.

Now all that said, Chinese also has its funny phrases. We were at the flower market last weekend and B wanted to know if the flowers were suitable (he shi) for direct sun, so I told the lady:

“Zai Tai Tai de yang tai, tai yang tai da” or “On wifey’s porch the sun is quite strong”

The lady answered “no problem” in the blink of an eye. It didn’t phase me until we walked away how strange that (mostly) correct sentence was AND that someone else could even understand it! Gotta love Chinese.

Taipei Zoo Panda
Originally uploaded by beuk

We finally made it to the Taipei Zoo to see the pandas on loan from
China.