Today it is finally for the first time slightly cold in Taipei. Note: we are not wearing North Face (like everyone else in Taipei), but since G has bronchitis I figured I should clothe the baby at least a little bit. I know it is sickening that we match, but I love it! I even remember matching my whole family when I was growing up.

If you don’t like it, tough. Take it up with Mommy, our tailor.

Posted via email from beuk’s posterous

Ok, ok, if you follow me at all, you know I love to rant. I have tried to keep quiet for some time now but with places like this in Taipei, it is just too difficult.

We were out and about in Taipei on Saturday, as we are want to do, and looking for an ice cream place. I remembered seeing a lil place 1/2 way down from city hall on Ren-Ai Lu. Indeed we found it easily. Our first clue that something was amiss was the name, “Mi Casa.” Not the name I would have chosen for an Italian ice store. Next, when we went in all we saw was bread. Not unusual for Taiwan, as the only way Taiwanese can survive is via bread, but we did not immediately see the ice cream. After crossing the store and 1000 stares, we reached a freezer. The flavors were disconcerting. There was black olive, taro root, and pea. Yes, pea. We chose to opt instead for the traditional caramel (care-ah-mel for Sangeeth) and coffee. We were advised that if we were eating in we could get a larger portion than the take home portion. No problem we took a seat outside.

After we were settled outside we were told that in order to sit outside there was a minimum purchase and that two ice creams was not enough. What? Fine, whatever. We ordered 2 coffees to get our bill up to the minimum. Then the ice came. The caramel was … burnt. and the coffee had freezer burn. Both were inedible. This is asking saying a lot, as it takes a lot for this family to shirk ice cream. It sent B into such a tirade that she was still complaining when the lady came with coffees and didn’t pull any punches. “This is horrible.” is one of the nicest things I can quote here. Needless to say, our hopes melted much faster than the freezer burn.

Our thoughts were two-fold: We think the store is trying to make its own ice cream as the containers did not have a brand. We also think they know they don’t get repeat business, therefore the minimum fee.

If you are looking for a rest, skip this store, head to the end of the park, turn right and eat at the Ben & Jerry’s knock off. I am no Hungry In Taipei and indeed her write-up is better than mine, but even she says the caramel is burnt.

Delta Crown Room
Originally uploaded by beuk

Sitting in the crown room waiting to go to Taipei. Hating our TSA
experience. Seriously, who’s job do I need to take to fix TSA?

I am having a tough time getting the picture to look right, but you guys get the idea.

This is a simple worksheet of what to call the people in your family in Asia. In the U.S. everybody is just Aunt “So and So” and Uncle “John.” Grandma and Grandpa might be differentiated by first names, but both sets are still Grandma and Grandpa. Not so in Taiwan. Here there is a specific name for each member in the family depending on which side (mother or father) they come from.

If you put my daughter G in the middle she would be the “zi ji” (or yourself). Brothers and sisters are named according to being male or female and if they are older are younger than you. Hence an older brother is “Ge Ge” and a younger sister is “Mei Mei” (note: all young girls you encounter are typically called Mei Mei being a sweet name for “lil sister”). “Biao’s” are cousins and you need to specify. G’s cousin is a younger (than her) boy so he would be “Biao Di”.

Going up the chain you get “BaBa’s” side and “MaMa’s” side. Since “MaMa” technically “entered” the family, she is the foreign one and hence Grandma and Grandpa are called “Wai Bo” (sometimes Po?) and “Wai Gong” where “Wai” means foreign. Even our Aunt MB gets a raw deal being called “Jiu Ma” or the wife of the outsider’s brother.

The father’s side is a lil nicer with “Gu Gu” and “Ye Ye”. Maybe this is where the Beatles song came from? “She loves you Ye Ye???” Just don’t mispronounce “Nai Nai” for “Nei Nei” or you will end up calling Grandma “old Boobies” (I know it still works, but still).

Now imagine a family reunion where each person is called a different name depending on their relationship with the person doing the calling. For this reason when games are played, players usually have to choose yet another name that they will be called for the duration of the game. It just would not work if everyone was shouting out a different name for the same person. With all this confusion over who you call what I am starting to see why there was a one child policy.

No talking in the elevator!
Originally uploaded by beuk

Taipei has gone a lil overboard with swine flu scare. Not only do
people wear masks on a regular basis, but our daughter’s school has
instituted a whole bunch of new daily rules:
1. Sanitize hands
2. Have temperature taken
3. Change shoes
4. No trips abroad
5. If you feel ill stay home for a week
6. Store diaper in plastic bag
7. You can only use your pre-assigned POS towel and not any random
towel.
Etc…

I feel that this is out of hand. First off I am supposed to sanitize
my hands at the school, the office, the mall, and my language class.
Why? This cannot be healthy. In 2 years our daughter has been sick
twice instead of the average 10 times a year for her age WITHOUT doing
this! Second there have been 6 swine flu deaths in ALL of Taiwan!
Yet they closed 15 schools in TAIPEI alone and now are rumoring that
students will have to learn via radio at home. What? People die of
the flu. It is a fact of life and yes it is sad. Just because you give
it a name or number does not make it any worse than it was before.

I knew all this was crazy, but the final straw is this sign saying we
cannot talk in the lift. What? Who the heck are you to tell me I
cannot talk and what is the point of the mask if I cant talk with it on?
How about no breathing? That would solve the flu problem. Furthermore
no one calls it a lift. Taiwan don’t pretend you do or I will run you
over with my pram and stick you in my bum bag.

I am going to the US with my daughter soon for two weeks. I will make
darn sure our first stop is rolling with the pigs on the nearest farm
and then coming back to give teacher a big hug.

Madison Scouts in Taipei
Originally uploaded by beuk

This guy is a long way from Wisconsin listening to the Boston Brass in
concert tonight. Nice to see DCI has a following even over seas!

We tried a new hamburger place just down the street in a back alley today. JB burgers. We go the sense that it might be a Christian restaurant when we walked in and I said, “This music sounds like what we play at church.” Then there was the blessing of the patties… (J.K.) Although it did get us thinking why they were open on a Sunday and if JB stood for Jesus Burgers? Regardless the burgers were good and even B liked her bun less pattie. We may have to go again soon!